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One Liner "Blonde Jokes" - Printable Version

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One Liner "Blonde Jokes" - Carsman - 04-21-2018

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Q: Why are only 2% of blondes touch-typists?
A: The rest are hunt'n peckers.

Q: Why do blondes make bad bank robbers?
A: Because they tie up the safe and blow the guards.

Q: What is every blonde's ambition in life?
A: To be like Vanna White and learn the alphabet.

Q: What is the difference between a smart blonde and Bigfoot?
A: Bigfoot has been sighted.


RE: One Liner "Blonde Jokes" - BigMark - 04-21-2018

[Image: nrceG.gif]


RE: One Liner "Blonde Jokes" - Carsman - 04-21-2018

.

Q: What is the blonde doing when she holds her hands tightly over her ears?
A: Trying to hold on to a thought.

Q: How do you keep a blonde in the shower all day?
A: Give her a bottle of shampoo which says "lather, rinse, repeat."

Q: How can you tell a blonde has used your computer?
A: There is white out on the screen.

Q: How does a blonde turn on the light after sex?
A: Opens the car door.


RE: One Liner "Blonde Jokes" - Carsman - 04-23-2018

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Q: If a blonde and a burnette were to jump off a bridge at the same time witch one would hit the water first?
A: The burnette cause the blonde would have to stop and ask for directions.

Q: Why did the blonde highjack a plane and demand to be taken to Jeopardy?
A: Because she was told that 1000 jobs were in Jeopardy.

Q: How do you recognize a natural blonde at the beach ?
A: They wear their g-strings backwards.

Q: What do you call a blonde who never takes a shower?
A: A dirty blonde.


RE: One Liner "Blonde Jokes" - Carsman - 05-12-2018

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Q: Why was the blonde disappointed with her trip to England?
A: She found out Big Ben is only a clock.

Q: Why is it okay for blondes to catch cold?
A: They don't have to worry about blowing their brains out.

Q: Did you hear about the blonde who tried to blow up her husband's car?
A: She burned her lips on the tailpipe.


RE: One Liner "Blonde Jokes" - quer - 05-14-2018

cool )


RE: One Liner "Blonde Jokes" - Carsman - 08-05-2018

Q: Why did the blonde couple freeze to death in their car at a drive-in movie theater?
A: They went to see "Closed for the Winter".   hah

Q: Why did the blonde have a sore navel?
A: Because her boyfriend was also blonde! hah

Q: What do you do when a blonde throes a hand grenade at you?
A: Pull the pin and throw it back. hah


RE: One Liner "Blonde Jokes" - aussiefriend - 08-06-2018

Blonde jokes are sexist and a cancer. I am a redhead, and I have suffered hatred and had abused hurled at me in my life. Nowadays I am like, I'm black, and I'm proud.


RE: One Liner "Blonde Jokes" - BigMark - 08-06-2018

I get Red in my beard, im a Mick.


RE: One Liner "Blonde Jokes" - Duchess - 08-06-2018

I have some red in my hair right now, some blonde & light brown too.


RE: One Liner "Blonde Jokes" - Maggot - 08-06-2018

i like Tapioca colored hair.


RE: One Liner "Blonde Jokes" - Duchess - 08-06-2018

I'm a freak. I have several different colors.


RE: One Liner "Blonde Jokes" - Midwest Spy - 08-06-2018

(08-06-2018, 11:27 AM)Duchess Wrote: I'm a freak. I have several different colors.

Walking around the house in a bikini bottom and nothing else?

It is summer after all.


RE: One Liner "Blonde Jokes" - Duchess - 08-06-2018

No, black crochet maxi dress, bare feet and a shit ton of hair that feels like a blanket every time I step outdoors.


RE: One Liner "Blonde Jokes" - Midwest Spy - 08-06-2018

That’s funny!

My wife and kids just left on their way to family lake place in Crosslake.

I’m not joining until Thursday.


RE: One Liner "Blonde Jokes" - Clang McFly - 08-06-2018

(08-06-2018, 09:38 AM)BigMark Wrote: I get Red in my beard, im a Mick.

I got light blonde and gray in my beard. I'm a Kraut.

I was blonde on top of my head when I was born, then it all turned brown. Blonde and blue eyed.


RE: One Liner "Blonde Jokes" - aussiefriend - 08-06-2018

Patti Sanger from Millionaire Matchmaker is always saying horrible things about redheads and calling them firecrotch and loads of personal derogatory things. She can be quite abusive. She says she is all about love, but sometimes she is domineering, controlling and unkind. That's not love.


RE: One Liner "Blonde Jokes" - sally - 08-06-2018

I am dark brown with dark brown pubes. I've never been ridiculed over it, but I imagine it would be humiliating. The nerve of some people, I can't wrap my mind around the hatred.


RE: One Liner "Blonde Jokes" - BigMark - 08-06-2018

Pube essence.


RE: One Liner "Blonde Jokes" - Midwest Spy - 08-06-2018

(08-06-2018, 07:27 PM)aussiefriend Wrote: Patti Sanger from Millionaire Matchmaker is always saying horrible things about redheads and calling them firecrotch and loads of personal derogatory things. She can be quite abusive. She says she is all about love, but sometimes she is domineering, controlling and unkind. That's not love.

In her defense, she’s got huge, full breasts.