KNOCK KNOCK

[Donovan]

Who was that who landed on Plymouth Rock again? Oh yeah ENGLISH EXPLORERS you stoopid septic motherfucker. Without the “bootlickers” and “sycophants” your country would even exist you dumbass yankee prick.

The only reason our early settlers were English is because the best of your forefathers looked around, realized they were in England, and said "Oh HELL no, fuck this we're outta here." Then we had the good sense to come over here, bring in a bunch of Hessians, Dutch, Spanish and Frenchies, plus darkies and Irishmen and Italians and whatnot, then fucked all them plus some indians to spread the gene pool out a little. If we'd stayed in mother England we'd still be inbred wankers like you.

As for asskicking? We kicked so much ass we created the largest and greatest empire in the history of the planet. We like kicking ass so mu.ch we signed up for both world wars waaaaaay before you did yankee doo dah.

I'm sure the Romans, Ottomans, Persians etc would beg to differ. You guys just got anally invaded by every berserker tribe from the Angles to the Saxons to the Vikings to the Germans ad nauseum until the very language you gave the world was so fucked up even you guys don't get it right half the time. You invented an entire time period called the Dark Ages, named after those years you were all hiding under the bed simultaneously and tongue-kissing plague rats. The only reason you signed up for the two world wars is because they were in your back yard, you could hardly ignore them. But while you may have beat us to the world war starting gate, we ENDED those motherfuckers. With authority and split fucking atoms. We show up when we're damn good and ready, and when we say so the party is over.You might remember we did that a couple times to your stupid asses as well before you figured out it was better to stay on our good side.

You follow the example that we set for you, London is Americas Babylon. America the land created by elite Freemasons with English accents who when they weren't busy given each other funny handshakes and showing off their bare left tit were probably tossing each other off.

And now Britain is America's bedpan servant. How's that taste, Jane Eyre? Take a lot of tea to wash that shit down, huh? The "world's greatest empire" reduced to washing the underwear of the world's equivalent to a bunch of angry petulant teenagers shooting up the prom with machine guns. Worst part is, after your value dropped and you got ugly we dumped you for Israel, so you're not even our favorite bitch any more...