RANTINGS OF A LUNATIC

[BlueTiki]

Justice for Johnny & Lisa
Oh johnny how sorry i truly am my son for all the evil wicked tongues out there that speak so aweful but yet are clueless of how sweet kind giving loving and wonderful you truly are. And if you werent trying to help other from self destruction you wouldve left people standing alone and been here with us and still alive today ;,,(( im so sorry people cnt see that right now but they sure will soon enough!!! IAM VERY PROUD AND BLESSED TO BE YOUR MOMMA and god will make sure those wicked tongues perish and are judged properly for all the slander lies and attacks. Rest in heavenly peace my sweet love with your beautiful lisa JUSTICE WILL BE SERVED

I believe this is what Maytee was trying to say in her 'Justice' post, quoted above:

"Johnny, I'm sorry that I put my needs before that of you, your father and your brothers. I know my actions and choices must have caused you great shame and embarrassment. And yet, you accepted me.

Unfortunately, like a loving child who trusts his mother, you embraced many of my self-serving behaviors, self-righteous attitudes and poor lifestyle choices. I blame myself for your foray into criminal activity. I was too preoccupied with my wants to teach you right from wrong, weak from strong and the value of an education from the value of easy money.

And now, my actions will taint your memory and cause people to always wonder "Would his life have taken a different direction if his mother and father were law abiding parents?".

You were a 'momma's boy' not by choice, but by my need for attention. I stunted your development to become a self-sufficient young man with a solid education, morals, skills and the tools to live a rich and full life with confidence and direction.

Because I failed you, I continue to lie, blame and spew hatred to others in an attempt to hide my shame. My hatred, lying and blaming is even directed at your dear and innocent Lisa. But it is easier to blame others than to accept that I must own my shortcomings, miserable attitude and behaviors.

Therefore, Johnny, I will continue to use your tragic and untimely death as a vehicle to somehow 'makeover' my failed and empty life.

I will use every opportunity to use the memory of you and Lisa to transform my image from a selfish and fearful woman to one of a devoted and selfless mother of a saint.

Your death allows me to reveal my true nature, publicly, while hiding behind the facade of grief. Thank you for this.

And when God judges me, have no fear. I'll blame the skank ass Mocktards for my failures and sins.

TW, Duchess, Cracker and LC individually, too."