WHOSE FAULT IS IT?

[Duchess]

I don't know and anything I want to say about addictions & will power sounds trite. I think it's way more complicated than I see it.

[sally]

Experts? Any opinions?

I'm only addicted to cigarettes and the only way I know of to quit is with will power. Or that pharmaceutical drug Chantix that makes some people suicidal.

I think it only takes will power to quit anything, although I know certain drugs and alcohol can cause terrible DT's which makes it a lot harder.

[BlueTiki]

The 'rush' however of winning when I wagered made it all worth it.

So, is it my will power that keeps me from relapsing or is it my fear of losing my family that stops me? Either way, it seems I have a choice in front of me to make.

The "rush" of winning?

It was the losing that kept you chasing the high.

There are always choices and there are "needs" . . . some psychological; some physical.

Often the needs override the choices . . . and this is not mutually exclusive to addiction.

I'd like to know what you replaced gambling with . . . to fill the need.

I'd wager it has something to do with pussy.

[Midwest Spy]

It WAS the thrill of winning that provided the rush. Chasing the losses is what digs the hole.

And, nope, haven't indulged myself in pussy.

I'm really waiting to hear from Aussieknowitall.

Even in my attempt to understand addiction, I wouldn't deny that being addicted to gambling (and I'm not certain I was addicted, that's a pretty strong word) and that euphoria, isn't different than drug addiction. It's got to be.

[aussiefriend]

I'm really waiting to hear from Aussieknowitall.

My diagnosis is that you are a textbook misogynist. You are threatened by women with more knowledge, knowledge is power, than you. The female is equal to, and in some cases better than the male of the species.

[BlueTiki]

It WAS the thrill of winning that provided the rush. Chasing the losses is what digs the hole.

Dude . . . reread the sentence: "It was the losing that kept you chasing the high."

If you knew you were always going to win, there would be no rush.

Losing made you chase the high of winning.

Maybe that's why you feel the necessity to shamelessly and overtly put the moves on Mock's women . . . chasing a high from a virtual "score"?

Push away from the table and cut your losses.

[Midwest Spy]

What moves am I putting on the ladies of Mock?

Are you serious?

Complementing Sally on her legs or HotD on her figure? Aussie on her 'crazy as a rat in a tin shithouse, but probably a great lay'?

As for the gambling, I think because it's been at least 4 years I've kind of forgotten the thrill of it all.

[BlueTiki]

What moves am I putting on the ladies of Mock?

Are you serious?

This is denial.

This is one of many indicators of addiction.

Justification and rationalization, too.

The more you know . . .

[aussiefriend]

Aussie on her 'crazy as a rat in a tin shithouse, but probably a great lay'?

You know what? That is so tacky. I don't mean to pull rank on you, but you force my hand. In 1981 I first saw Simple Minds in concert, we could see backstage as we were in the front row right at the front of the stage. We saw Jim Kerr and he waved to us several times, he was a really nice guy. They were an unknown band in those days. Fast forward years later, rich and famous, and Jimmy Kerr met one of my friends who worked at a high profile record store, all he talked about was the 'chickies' and getting laid. I even saw now old Jimmy Kerr referring to women as 'fillys' as in horses. You remind me of Jimmy Kerr, at first you come across as a nice guy but scratch the surface you are an offensive full of male chauvinism critter.

I am surprised you admitted to a gambling addiction, now when are you going to admit to your online porn addiction?

[BlueTiki]

I am surprised you admitted to a gambling addiction . . .

He never really did admit it . . . hinted . . . but no outright ownership.

Good luck getting him to spill on the porn thing.

"No . . . really. I can quit any time I want to. I just don't want to at this moment. Besides . . . I only look at the free stuff. It's not like it's taking food out of my children's mouths!"

[HairOfTheDog]

MS has dished the dirt in regards to his excessive flatulence, his irritable bowels, his bad breath, his premature ejaculation problem, and his power to bring women to their knees with his piercing blue eyes.

The gambling addiction/rationalization is the least surprising of his on-line confessions, to me.

[Midwest Spy]

'Alive & Kicking' is still in my top 250 playlist.

No porn addiction, but it does suck that it's so prevalent and easy to access.

It's funny, even when I try to have discussions on serious topics, somehow someone ELSE, turns it into me and women.

Now, I've related some experiences from years WAY past, but that's not to be confused with me in the here and now.

I've turned the corner Aussie.

[BlueTiki]

. . . it does suck that it's so prevalent and easy to access.

Why?

Did your father own a newsstand?

[username]

I also don't like the "powerless over drugs/alcohol" thing in step one. It's bullshit, in my opinion. Everyone has the power, they just need to fucking use it.

Didn't you say you went on a crazy binge for a week and went to your employer to ask for help/rehab? If everyone has the power to stop, why did you need to do all that other stuff? And, IIRC, drugs or alcohol had been fucking up your life for years before you stopped. Why didn't you just quit a long time ago?

[thekid65]

Because I hadn't had enough of the bullshit. And at the time, I too considered myself a "functioning alcoholic". Sure, I had never gotten a DUI, or worse..hurt/killed someone else (I dunno howdafuck I got so lucky, I drove over the legal limit more than I drove sober). Had kept the same job for 25+ years at the time, was married, owned my house/car, etc, etc.

Nevermind the fact that I was always leaving work early to start drinking. Nevermind the fact that while I had a 10 minute drive home from work, and a case of beer in the fridge...I still had to stop at the gas station next to work for a tall boy to chug on the way home. Nevermind the fact that I was somewhat worthless for the first hour or two in the am at my job due to the shakes. Nevermind the fact that I was pretty much a recluse in my own home. Nevermind the fact that breakfast was 2 cups of coffee, and beer starting at 5:00am. Nevermind the fact that on the golf course at 6:30am I had already drunk 3-4 beers at home before I got there, and was the only one drinking on the course. Nevermind the fact that when I look back, I really was a complete dick...not only to my coworkers at times, but also to my family. My Boss told me shortly after I had quit, that I was extremely close to being terminated.

These are all things (and many others) that I didnt see at the time, that I do see now. Ya see..to me...it wasnt a problem..and that's why I suppose I didnt quit. The one thing I had always been proud of was my work. My longevity, my attendance, and my position. And when I had called into work for almost a week straight after I went on that bender...well..I reached out for help..as taking the first step, and getting my ass into treatment, was something I couldnt do on my own. The quitting thing I thought I could do on my own, as I have done it before with multiple other drug addictions I had. When the VP of my company told me I could not come into work anymore until I got the help I needed that was my fucking wake up call. I would have lost my job, and with that, would have been a loss of everything.

I guess that would have been my "rock bottom", and I quite frankly didnt want to go there. I just needed the help in taking the first step. I and knew I needed help for the first 2 weeks...withdrawals suck, and I thought my best chance of success would be to go to treatment, to where I wouldnt be alone, and the option of saying fuck this, I'm going to the liquor store, wasnt there. I always knew I was/am an addict...the thing is, in my drunken haze...I failed to realize that my problem was causing me problems. And when I realized that, and I was about to lose everything, that's when I woke the fuck up.

I do believe everyone has the power within them to stop, what some are lacking is the ability to recognize the problem and how it's affecting their life, the desire, and the knowledge on how to use that power.

[Cynical Ninja]

You are a certified nut. There is nothing left you can say on the subject.

It's brazenly obvious that you took something I said and twisted it all around in an effort to make it appear that I feed my kids garbage. Especially when everyone can read what I actually did say. When I pointed out that you are the one who in fact lives off a diet of frozen meals, canned corn and chocolate eclairs you lost the few marbles you had left. And it doesn't look like they're coming back.

There's nothing left I can say? In your dreams beerhag I'm just getting warmed up!

You accuse me of making shit up then go and do exactly the same fucking thing yourself!

You did (without any doubt whatsoever) say you fed your family a meal so unhealthy it made you feel bad. You did (without any doubt whatsoever) say you had no problem with feeding your kids bowls of candy for their breakfast. Also your cooking maintains your poor husbands Jabba the Hutt physique and you were a regular smoker (poisoning your kids with passive smoke) and you are a regular drinker.

FACT!

Fakepoop and hotdog (who have both reached a stage now where if I say salt they will say sugar) can yap all they like it makes no difference whatsoever to me.

It will never change the facts.

And the facts are me and my family are immeasurably healthier and fitter than you and yours will EVER be.

And you can take that to the bank you unhealthy yankee beerhag.

[Cynical Ninja]

So kid?

Was pot your gateway drug?

[HairOfTheDog]

hotdog (who have both reached a stage now where if I say salt they will say sugar) can yap all they like it makes no difference whatsoever to me.

Not so, CN. Sometimes I agree wholeheartedly with your posts.

I've been reading sally's posts in the "What's for Dinner?" thread for years now. She used to be a cook and makes some killer meals, most of which are pretty healthy.

I also saw her fridge contents when she posted them in the "What's in your Fridge?" thread months ago. Healthy stuff.

Those are posted as fact in the Soup Kitchen forum.

I wouldn't waste time expressing a different opinion from your's simply to disagree with you. You just keep banging a drum that something is a blanket truth, when everything I've seen contradicts it, over one post where it was clearly stated that the situation was an exception.

Anyway, I don't care who eats what.

Welcome back.

[username]

I don't know about the term "functioning alcoholic" although it sort of applies to my parents. They did [very] well financially, my dad never lost his job over drinking, my mom was always "there" fix boo-boo's and bringing home made cupcakes to school events; no trouble with the law or anything.

That said, I don't care if they were stuck in traffic on the 405 freeway, at 5pm, they'd pull out their traveling booze bags and mix themselves up either a martini or a manhattan for the rest of the drive home. It was like they had some giant, internal alarm clock at cocktail hour. I can't speak for everyone else but I don't think "DUI" was even in my parent's vocabulary. In the old days, the officer was more likely to join you for a cup and send you on your way than drag your ass to jail. Different times.

I dunno, it's akin to 'functioning retarded" if you think about it (when alcohol has that much control over your life).

[Cynical Ninja]

Not so, CN. Sometimes I agree wholeheartedly with your posts.

I've been reading sally's posts in the "What's for Dinner?" thread for years now. She used to be a cook and makes some killer meals, most of which are pretty healthy.

I also saw her fridge contents when she posted them in the "What's in your Fridge?" thread months ago. Healthy stuff.

Those are posted as fact in the Soup Kitchen forum.

I wouldn't waste time expressing a different opinion from your's simply to disagree with you. You just keep banging a drum that something is a blanket truth, when everything I've seen contradicts it, over one post where it was clearly stated that the situation was an exception.

Anyway, I don't care who eats what.

Welcome back.

Fair enough.

I haven't read much of the “what's for dinner” thread so can't really comment on it, I am merely discussing the time sal said she made a meal so unhealthy she felt bad. I thought it was incredibly retarded. Also when she said she had no problem with Lucky Charms I thought that was incredibly retarded because you are basically saying you have no problem serving your kids marshmallows for breakfast.

Is Sals general cooking healthy? I don't know I would ask the question is she feeding her orca fat hubby the same food she feeds her family? In which case....hmmmmmm.

And when she turned around and counter accused me of having an unhealthy diet! Woah! Time out!

“You and our families on treadmills now Sal let's place bets which family can run faster and for longer shall we? I could go out right now and jog ten miles in a decent time, Sals hubby would be lucky to get as far as 3 blocks without his heart exploding.